Since my blog bit the dust midway through the year, I won’t do the “great moments from 2005″ post… But I will give you my personal goals for 2006:
More pics on my blog
Ok, stop it. I know what you’re saying and it’s not funny. I’m talking about snapshots of things, pics of the kids, maybe a pic of the dog.
Read more books
Props to my lovely wife for the John McCain book for Christmas. It’s more of a, um, “bathroom” book than anything, but nonetheless it’s interesting and well written and fits into my one-chapter-a-day life.
Become an internet millionaire and retire
Seriously. This is the year.
Start a fake internet rap group
See above. Really, it’s brilliant. There is absolutely NO ONE in this space right now.
Visit the MoMA in NYC
Culture. Werd.
Design my Squeezable Peanut Butter Jar and Pitch it to JIF
My wife thinks I’m stupid, but this is even more brilliant than fake internet rap. We have squeeze tooth paste. Why not squeeze peanut butter??? Seriously. How many times have you gotten peanut butter all over your knuckles trying to dig out that last tablespoon from the jar?
As I’ve said many, many times here, America is starting to suck. We’re getting fat and lazy. We’re letting ourselves go.
For further evidence, read Jamie’s post on the Blizzog.
The guy was convicted of blasting 4 people with a shotgun. He founded the “Crips” gang. That’s enough for most people in a lifetime. But as usual people lose perspective, and Hollywood in general, slobbers all over itself to make everything a cause.
“It’s nine-fifteen on twelve-thirteen and another black king will be taken from the scene,” Snoop Dogg said.
Um, Snoop. It’s December twenty-one and the due killed four people with a gun.
The best had to be Tony Robbins. The fact he was even at the funeral is hilarious. Was Dr. Phil not available?
Robbins told the mourners he knew Williams only a short time but said he had “so much rage and so much anger” after his execution.
Where’s the rage and anger at the four people who were shot to death 26 years ago? Or the countless lives that have been lost in gang violence since?
yah, I’m on the bandwagon.
Actual conversation tonight during ABC’s Monday Night Football, with 13 minutes left in the 4th quarter:
Madden: “If you were to mix the color yellow with the color red, what color would you get?”
Michaels: “Yellow and Red. This is like [unintelligble]. Orange, right?”
Madden: “No. Green.”
Michaels: (like someone just told him the world was round) “Yellow and red make GREEN????”
Now Madden is explaining how his tie turned green cause he spilled mustard on it at halftime.
It’s only filler until the next Zales commercial.
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